George Dunne - A Place for Warriors
I played George Dunne last Sunday morning. It’s a place for golf warriors, for trunk smashers, muni stalkers…whatever you want to call them. I’m talking about people that just want to play golf and don’t care about what happens before they step onto the first tee or after they walk off the 18th green.
You don’t go to George Dunne if you want breakfast or lunch before your round. You don’t go to George Dunne to play poker with your buddies after the round, eat free snack mix, or watch sports on a bunch of 52-inch plasmas. Heck, at George Dunne, you actually have to carry your clubs from your car to the clubhouse, so don’t even think about bringing clients here. This is a place meant only for an all-out brawl with a nasty, 18-headed beast, and there could be a lot of blood. Take your clients to a Cubs game, everybody is always happy there.
I don’t want to scare you away, but if you are the type that needs to have a pair of shiny golf shoes in front of your locker and a nice bench to sit on while you change into them, you should stay away. In fact, if you’re the type that needs to warm up on a huge grass range with a bunch of nice Titleists stacked in a pyramid; you’re not going to like this place. If you show the slightest hint of desire for these club-style amenities, I would go as far as to say that George Dunne will grab you by the ankles, turn you upside down, and mop the bathroom floor with your tongue. That’s bad, because the bathroom is pretty rough (but they did install some no-touch paper towel dispensers since the last time I played…nice).
With all of this, here’s the rub, YOU WILL BE BEGGING FOR MORE! Once you step onto that first tee, you will forget about the lack of amenities. You are immediately transported into a world of lush fairways, thick hardwood forests, serene lakes, huge weeping willows, no houses, and a layout that matches or exceeds any golf course I’ve played in Chicagoland. Each and every hole is distinctive and memorable, but don’t let the scenery distract you for a moment. If you let your guard down for a second, if you don’t plot your strategy on each tee, George Dunne will sock you in the jaw. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a fair fight, but when you get to the finishing holes, you can’t help but think that the drafting board of architects Nugent and Killian was temporarily taken over by none other than…SATAN.
I carry my clubs just about every time here. It just seems like the right thing to do. This is golf stripped down to its barest essentials - one person and a bag full of clubs heading into the forest to engage the aforementioned 18-headed beast. And if you’re a walker, you will never have to part with more than $50, even on a weekend morning during peak season. That is a mind-boggling bargain, and it gets even better if you keep your eyes peeled for coupons and specials (sign up at www.ezlinks.com).
Don’t let another summer go by without playing George Dunne; it’s even worth braving the Dan Ryan traffic.